How can you get difficult people to leave you alone?

questionHere’s a question from a friend on facebook. I’ll leave it unedited so you can see his frustration. What advice would you give him?


Trevor what do you do when a pig of a woman won’t leave you alone ?


Fight with honour…

H one in on the topic at hand. Speak to the situation “This is what you did/said; this is why I disagree/it upset me.”

O nly speak words of life. Cut out the sarcasm, condemnation and shame.

N ame calling and labels are never to be returned. Resorting to name calling and labels is the same as trying to place curses on people. Don’t do it to them, even if they started it.

O perate in the present. Avoid saying, “You always” and “You never”. Both are untrue and are used to simply cause pain. If you’re physically present with the person, look at them in the eye and don’t turn your back to them.

U nderstand the other person. Don’t think about your comeback, instead listen actively to what the other person is saying. Listen to understand, not to win the argument.

R esolve the argument. It’s OK to disagree. Allow them the right to hold their own opinion. Don’t go to bed angry because it gives the enemy a foothold. (Ephesians 4:25-27). Following an argument, don’t bring it up with others to rally support or curry pity; continue to honour the other.

Hope that helps. It’s never easy…but it life and situation changing.


Trevor Lund is the founder and publisher of and the Creator of the International Fast from Negativity available at He's also the pastor at Harvest Community Church in Beaumont Alberta. Find out more about this site and Contact Trevor Lund via email at





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