Is God sending me a non-christian to marry?

I enjoy and am humbled by the questions people trust me with.  Here’s one from a RevTrev Reader that really has me praying.

 I am a christian widow 43 years old I need to marry again but the men who propose to are non-christians/believers.  I have been praying for a Godly husband now my question is are these people coming from God because I did not ask for a non-believer.

Is God sending me a non-christian to marry?

Thanks for your question. Here’s my advice.

Ask and you will receive. Seek and you will find. Knock and the door will be open. (Matthew 7:7)

I know you know this and you have been doing this.

I know hope that is deferred makes the heart sick. (Prov 13:12)

Just remember that – the end of a matter is better than the beginning and patience is better than pride. (Ecc. 7:8)

Is God sending non-christians to you?

No.

He doesn’t tempt us. (James 1:13)

Remember what Paul said in 2 Corithians 6:14-15 (NLT)

Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness? What harmony can there be between Christ and the devil? How can a believer be a partner with an unbeliever?

Now this verse isn’t about marriage, but is about all our major relationships in life and does apply to marriage.

I’ve personally seen too many women sure that they could change the guy they were “in love” with. None of them are in happy relationships any longer.

And just marrying a Christian isn’t enough to have a great marriage. Just dating people who go to church isn’t enough. I know beasts of men who start attending church to find a “good women” to marry. You need someone who is ready to die for you.

Ephesians 5:21-26 New Living Translation (NLT) tells us about the relationship we need to be willing to wait and work for:

And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything.

For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her  to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word.

My prayer for you is that you find someone who is willing to love you like Christ loved the church – someone who will love you with a love that …is patient and kind. [A] love [that] is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. [A love that] does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. [A love that] does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. [A] Love [that] never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7)

That’s the love God created you for. You are a child of the King, you deserve nothing less. He’s out there…being formed more and more into the image of Christ right now. Pray for him, knowing God wants to bless you through him and him through you.

I’m praying for you.

Trevor

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